Torching Calories (and my pain tolerance)

Me on the stair master. Don't let the smile fool you, It was for the camera. Also, note the girls leg to the left. She is quite fit, and way better at the stair climber. ( see below)

Have you ever got a splinter? Gotten a flat tire? Do you know that horrible feeling that overwhelms you when you know you overslept or will be late for work? Have you ever gotten caught cheating on a test? or maybe fell down the steps? None of these things, no matter how annoying or horrible can possibly compare to my new nemesis, THE STAIR MASTER. If you've never had the pleasure of using this little hidden gym gem, you my friend are missing out. The StairMaster is absolutely, terrible. Let me explain, its HORRIBLE, TERRIBLE, NO GOOD, BAD,BAD, BAD! The idea of climbing endless steps is horrifying to say the least. BUT, its a calorie killer. This bad boy has the capability of torching about 1 calorie per step. Its intense. The past two days, Ive had the pleasure of watching two women go on this bad boy for 30 minutes! Never one to be shy, I accosted both of them on separate days to get the scoop. In the locker room, one woman told me she fell off of one once, and it took a while to get back on the horse. Now, shes up to 30- 50 minutes daily. She praised it as a killer workout, and since she was drenched in sweat, I believed her. Today, I had to share the one open Stair Master ( my gym only has two) with my friend Tim. While we traded on and off in 5 minute intervals, the woman next to us was in beast mode. 30 minutes in she was dripping sweat, all over the machine. Her skin was shinier than a polished metal. I asked her, how she did it and she said, she worked up to it and assured me that it gets easier each day. Apparently, I need to work up to my 30 minutes. For now, I am going to endure the pain of the Stair Master for its sheer calorie torching abilities. However, its one hell of a hard workout. So far, I can do 6 minutes without stopping. Tomorrow, I am going for 8! Climb if you dare, but be warned its a killer.